Some days I actually have time to sit and think of what all my life has become the last few years and today has been one of those.
I absolutely adore my life here in California with my absolute best companion and friend and love, but today, I am missing the mountains. I miss the comfort of leaving my home and within 20 minutes I can be hiding away in the front range by myself or with friends, for a weekend or just a few hours. I miss the smell of alpine in the high elevations. I miss the drive up to Boulder and how excited I got when I started to see the Flat Irons. I yearn for the feeling of butterflies in my belly from seeing and experiencing something completely new in such an inspiring place of wonder. The snow. Oh, the beautiful snow. I miss how when I worked out or was hiking I would yawn over and over because my body was trying to gasp in as much air as possible.. the thin air made me feel SO alive. I even miss what most consider annoyances.. the dry and hard crust inside my nose and the ever-drastically changing weather. I miss the place I called home from the moment I jumped out of the car for the first time in Colorado Springs, a year and a half ago.
But most of all.. I miss climbing outdoors. Don’t get me wrong, Lee and I are very lucky to be members at a climb gym and we go often.. but pulling on plastic is nowhere near the joy of grabbing limestone or sandstone and finding a way to shimmy up a rock with no pre-meditated route. Following taped routes can be very fun, and rewarding, but the fact is, climbing outdoors is freeing. It gives you the freedom to choose every hold you hold onto and every use of your body to guide you. I am a much more passionate climber when I am outdoors.. I find that indoor climbing gives me more frustration than desired due to not feeling satisfied with my climbs. Outdoor climbing is literally what some could call a Grand Show. The rewards you gain when you finish the route are not just a simple ‘woo-hoo I did it’ but most of the time it’s a ‘holy cow that was epic!’ and once you turn around and see the view behind you, often times you melt just a little and realize that you are seeing a view of the world that not many others have seen. I truly feel that climbing outdoors is a form of moving meditation and it cannot be fully explained. I am sucked into this sport.. It drives me and most of my decisions.
All I know is that the only thing driving Lee and I to stay here is money. So eventually we can move on to the part of life where we get to climb outdoors every single day and rent is non-existent. (See what I mean about all decisions somehow driven by climbing??) Just living our dream life, making our goals happen, and having fun with silly part-time jobs and a career in strictly living the perfect, adventurous life is what’s in store for us! So, for now, we are on the coast making money, paying debts, and living a short-lived life of full-time scheduled work.. Those things aren’t exactly thrilling in our eyes, but I am happy with where we are in life together. I just absolutely cannot wait until we start a new chapter in a new MOUNTAINOUS place. We have been discussing Bishop, California more seriously lately due to the fact that sport climbing and bouldering are both endless there, and we will still be in a wonderful central location for visiting other amazing destinations. We have, however, not dismissed Colorado, Utah, Oregon, Washington, Wyoming, and a few other western states as future options for living as well so that makes me excited. We are open to finding a new home within a year to relocate in our Train with our two crazy animals and only a few belongings to our name.
My light at the end of this short tunnel is shinning bright because I know we will be making our way to mountains soon enough. So for now I am taking advantage of gaining a connection with the ocean, sand, and never-ending chilly nights. An loving acceptance to the noise of airplanes flying over my house from 6 am to 10 pm every single day. An attachment to walking everywhere and only filling up the gas tank once a month. A love for this small, quirky, grungy, unique community.. and the utmost appreciation for the experience to be able to live right on the beach.. something many people would absolutely trade anything for. I am truly a blessed lady.
Wish us luck as we continually transition into a life together. Give us thoughts of positivity and courage.. so we stay happy although the circumstances aren’t ideal at the moment. That we can always be reminded of how blessed we are for health and love.. for the gift of being Crunch and Eleanor’s owners.. for the wonders of having found one another through the craziest circumstances, and for the gift of being able to express the same passions in life. Lee is a man of so many qualities that I never dreamt I would have in a partner, and I am hopeful that as time goes on we can live a not-even-close-to-normal life together in the best sense of the phrase possible :)
Our first photo together, the day we met.
Peace and love to all of you!